Why not the other way around

The battle and bashing has been on since like for ever.

I have always stayed out of them, because I found them dumb and not worth discussing and I have always felt it had to do with personal choice.I am talking about people's personal choice to date people of other tribe, country and particularly race.

I don't hate on a brother for dating a non-Nigerian or other race, I really have never been bothered.

I once saw a tweet on one of those random TTs on Twitter, where babe wrote that she is still single because the brothers have decided to be gay or date people of other race...biko if you happen to love someone who is not from your country abi race, go for it. 

some weeks back, I attended the birthday of one of the interns here in Hyderabad. The moment I  entered the club and saw them, I knew they were Nigerians but since I do not know them. I stayed on my lane, not because I could not talk to them but here one has to be careful and there are lot of gists about Nigerians even within ourselves. If they are not interns and not students, stay off them because they are usually trouble.

I was dancing with my flatmates and some other interns...I was dancing with a Kenyan guy most of the time and even when one of the Nigerian guy tried to dance with me, I turned to my flatmates.

Last weekend, I attended the farewell party of one of a Nigerian interns who is also a friend and all these Nigerian guys were there, they are students here in India and then when I introduce myself to them they all have this expression on their face. Apparently the dude, I refused to dance with had gone on to tell everyone that I fell his hand by dancing with a Kenyan instead of him. It was so funny that when they hear the Lara the next word was so you are the girl. I really did not think much of this on that day, because we all ended up joking about it and forgot the issue.

Today, I was chatting with a friend who I know has been with a couple of non-Nigerian girls and he told me he was disappointed in me. He talked about how Kenyans do not have swag like Nigerians and whatever gibberish he could think of. Okay, I am not going out with said Dude. I found the gist funny in the beginning but right now I am not amused. I am not one for male bashing but I think, this set of Nigerian boys are just the dumbest I ever met and I would not be surprised that there are a lot of them out.

I can live with or rather I am expected to live the idea of our guys chasing and marrying girls from other countries, biko why can't you.

♥ Lara  from Incredible India

A Stranger in the mirror

I see a strange in the mirror
Who she is, I do not know
even though she is molded in my image
I know nothing about her.

Do I like her, I am not sure
But I sure hell know, she is not me.
I do not want to be her,
I am better than her,
I want a better me and a better her.
----------------------
I must say, I have lost my way.
I don't know how, I don't when...all I know is that I am not on the right track...
I am not talking about my professional life right now, I am not complaining about the insane weather...I am not even talking about ever growing love for Hyderabad and how sad I am when my wonderful new friends leave.

T. Notes, now I understand better the struggles you post about, to think we are birthday mates.Lately, I have lost my zeal and passion for anything...I miss reading, I miss living life....yes, I stopped living.My life has become routine and maybe that is why I even find it boring, all I do is go to work, staying indoor weekend, party if I feel like and travel to the same cities I have been to.

The zeal for adventure and exploration is gone, I have been struggling to learn the Spanish letters, all my aspirations and dreams are all on hold for no reason.

Spiritual, I have fallen...I have fallen from the 50% I have always struggled with to less than 10%. I can blame it on the society I live in but I know it is still me who needs to make that decision to be closer to my God no matter the situation of things.

Coming to India was an opportunity for me to find myself and totally understand me...I am finding myself quite alright but I do not like the woman I am discovering. That woman, who is emotionally weak is not me or better said who I used to be.

A friend recently told me that I am hiding from the world...that I should let the world truly know me and I should stop hiding behind their assumptions of me...how true this is, I am yet to accept.

I have been living without thinking, I have been taking actions without thinking, I have been running away from thinking...Even though a part of this stranger is good, I want to be better and be the woman I have always wanted to be.

Not that super woman, but that strong independent woman who can balance every aspect of her life and accept every flaws she has...

I am as lost as the uncoordinated post...I hope I find my way back soon.
♥ Lara

My Chapatti Birthday

Pictures can not express my joy on my birthday...My Hyderabad family sure made it a memorable and happy one. Thank you all for the wishes and prayes, I really appreciate it.

♥ Lara  from Incredible India